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Dearest Darling Friends,

Last month my darling wife Bharathi purchased three different toothpaste variants. The regular simple Colgate for me that I have been using since the time we had teeth (experience, you see!).

Another one for the kids, was blue jelly type with floating dots that made it look like the amazing scenes from the depth of the oceans (deep sea diving experience, you see !). Another one for herself that proclaimed miraculous results for sensitive teeth (TV ads you see !).

I tried all three and it was fun. I am sticking to the old regular one that I am used to. At least it makes me think my teeth will be whiter !!! Ha ha ha.

On a lazy Saturday morning, my darling daughter Mahek, still sleepy eyed, a little late for her basketball class, pressed ‘my’ toothpaste tube. Hers is the blue one. Seeing the regular old paste emerge made her disappointed. Since the deed was done, she knew, her mother would insist on she using what she had taken out.

With sadness in her voice, with the shoulders shrugged low, with a ‘oh no !’ written on her face, she remarked, ‘How wonderful it would be if irrespective of the tube we press, the paste we want should come out.’

She looked at me wistfully. I gave her a helpless smile.

She stomped to her bed and sat down with a thud. She was NOT upset with herself! She was upset with the non co-operation of the tube !!! Why in the world, could it not give her what she wanted? Should it not have even the sense to understand what a kid wants? Is it not its duty to sleepy eyed kids, who win the big fight to wake up early when there is no school? Can’t it co-operate this little much and do its job properly? When will adults and toothpaste tubes understand small simple obvious needs of kids?

I guess these were her thoughts. With no words of solace that would make me sound confident or release her of her agony, all I could do is look at her with as much love as I could muster.

“Mahek !” This single word echoed in our entire house and got Mahek to her feet. Lazily, still unhappy, convinced adults will never understand kids, she trugged to the bathroom. She looked at the paste for almost 30 seconds wishing there was a way by which it would go back in. With a sigh that had resignation and a little fear of her mother ringing all over, with teary eyes, Mahek started brushing her teeth.

I pride on being a strong man. However, even I wished there was a tube that either had the option of pushing the paste back in or it ensured the paste that came out should always be the preferred one.

While this is an interesting thought for inventors and product developers, this episode opened my eyes to some other wonderful things.

Like the toothpaste, once done, in life, so many things can never be undone. Harsh words said, an accident due to rash driving, missing of opportunities because of over confidence, being absent when people genuinely needed you, will not be forgotten. So lets be careful and ensure we neither harm ourselves nor others.

Like the toothpaste, when squeezed, it is always what is inside that comes out. When life / circumstances / people squeeze me, the ‘me’ comes out. It leaves no place for me to hide. My strengths, my weaknesses, my character, my composure, my hidden agendas, my values, my fears, my violent streak, my insecurities, my needs, get revealed when I am squeezed.

The toothpaste teaches this lesson so eloquently, doesn’t it? When squeezed, it is always what is inside that comes out.

Did I blame others for my failures? Did I blame others for my misbehaviour? Did I blame others for my negative outbursts and negative emotions? Did I justify my mistakes by blaming circumstances and people? Or, did I take the incidences, when I was squeezed by life, to know myself better and improve every where necessary?

I have decided to know myself better through my responses when I am squeezed. Merely with this thinking, I am feeling more confident than ever before. I am feeling in more control than ever before. Tomorrow morning, I will look at the toothpaste tube with smile and gratitude. After all, it has taught me two invaluable lessons of life, isn’t it? And yes, there is one more realization. Whatever comes out from the tube is used to clean and freshen the mouth. Whatever has happened in my life, I will use it to clean and purify myself, make myself fitter and fresher.

When you are squeezed by life, we pray, may your inner beauty be revealed to you. When you are squeezed by life, we pray, may your inner strengths be revealed to you. When you are squeezed by life, we pray, may you emerge with pride. When you are squeezed by life, we pray, may you still smile when you see the rising sun, the blooming flowers, the flying birds, the sleeping child, and the night skies with its twinkling stars.

Thanks for reading.

With love, prayers and gratitude,
naren (www.lifeschool.co.in)

As I Live…I Learn